For immediate release: Uncle John himself has just been tapped to become a mid-season replacement for Simon Cowell on Fox’s American Idol. “I can’t believe they actually gave in to my demands,” beamed Uncle John, who added that he’s more talented than Ellen Degeneres, funnier than Kara DioGuardi, and funkier than Randy Jackson. Uncle John’s judging duties will begin sometime in the next few weeks. To prepare, he’ll be dusting off his old hi-fi record player and listening to the greats: Neil Sedaka, Twiggy, and both of the Yankovichs (Weird Al and the polka guy). “Now that’s some real music!” he said. Stay tuned for further details as they develop.
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