It’s Friday, so that means it’s time for your weekly fake-out. Here’s how it works: Two of the three following stories are true. And one of them we made up. Can you guess which one is the fake? Pick your answer at the end of the article and see if you’re right.
And you thought that HealthCare.gov was a fiasco. The New York Times reported last week that The Federal Register, a print and online journal that documents the federal government, from proclamations to executive orders and more, will no longer accept digital versions of documents via popular methods such as flash drive or SD card. No, they 3.5-inch plastic floppy discs, which have all but disappeared to since 2000. Most computers don’t even have them anymore. Discs must be regularly delivered to The Federal Registrar by courier.
A man flying from Louisiana to California fell asleep on the first leg of the trip. He later woke up in a cold, dark, locked plane by himself. The United Express jet’s other passengers and staff all neglected to wake Tom Wagner, who, after realizing that he was not, in fact, dreaming, called his girlfriend in a panic. “She thought I was crazy. I said, ‘Debbie I’m locked on the plane,’” he told reporters. “I said, ‘I’m telling you the truth. You better go somewhere and get me off this plane.” Once she figured out that he wasn’t joking, Debbie made calls to have him Wagner rescued. Workers arrived about a half hour later, and while they didn’t refund his flight, they did offer to put him up in a hotel and gave him a $250 voucher for his next flight on United Express.
Gordon Rodriguez was fed up with his bank teller job at First National Bank of Omaha. After landing a new job at a local credit union, he went out to celebrate with some friends. After a few rounds, Gordon left his friends at the bar, saying he was going to “get even” with his soon-to-be-former boss, Jim Maloney. At 2:40 a.m., Maloney called 911 to report that a man with no pants on had fallen off of his roof and was unconscious and bleeding on the front steps. It wasn’t until paramedics arrived that Maloney recognized Rodriguez. Rodriguez suffered a broken arm, a fractured rib, and a concussion. No word on whether the job at the credit union is still available (but the old one is probably off the table).
Want more fakes? Check out Uncle John’s Fake Facts. (Really!)