Here are three reports on some strange foods showing up in stadiums across the country. Two of them are real-life, viable alternatives to peanuts and hot dogs. One of them we simply made up. Can you guess which one is the fake? Answer is at the end of the post.

A.

Poutine is a classic Canadian—and deeply unhealthy—food item. It traditionally consists of french fries, topped with brown gravy, and cheese curds (and maybe bacon or more cheese). But what if that poutine emigrated to the U.S., and sold at a ballpark, and was made with, of all things, fruit? Then you’ve have Caramel Apple Fries. Currently available at AT&T Park for San Francisco Giants games, the healthier concession consists of green apples cut into thin, fries-like strips, then topped with thick gravy-like caramel sauce, and instead of cheese curds, chopped peanuts. (Okay, so it’s not that much healthier than poutine.)

B.

The Minnesota Twins got off to a rough start this season and never quite got out of the cellar—they’re currently in last place in the American League’s Central Division. After Twins manager Ron Gardenhire remarked to a reporter than the season was “in the toilet,” vendors at Target Field humorously began selling an item called “The Toilet Bowl.” It’s a ceramic coffee mug, shaped like a toilet, filled with soft-served chocolate ice cream.

C.

Debuting at Lambeau Field this fall for Green Bay Packers games is a concoction called The Horse Collar. Two extra-long kielbasas are placed in an extra-wide bun (which is more like a loaf). It’s then topped with oozy beer cheese sauce, onions, and fried sauerkraut. All that sausage and cheese is certainly representative of Wisconsin, but there’s something off about The Horse Collar. It’s served with the two ends meeting each other, making the entree more closely resemble a toilet seat (which will probably be pretty familiar to anyone who actually eats this thing by themselves).

Want more fake facts? Then check out Uncle John’s Fake Facts. (Really!)