Take packaged junk food…and turn it into something “gourmet” with one of these weird recipes. (Warning to healthy eaters: DON’T LOOK!)

Funyun Onion Rings

Grind a bag of Funyuns in a blender. (Funyuns are made from cornmeal that’s formed into rings and heavily seasoned with onion powder.) Dip slices of real onions in the Funyun crumbs, then dip in egg whites and cook in a deep-fryer.

Chicken McBigMac

Not getting enough meat in your diet? Try this: Buy a McDonald’s Big Mac and three McChicken sandwiches. Remove the three bun slices on the Big Mac and replace them with the fried McChicken chicken patties.

Coke Seafood Au Gratin

Combine two tablespoons of butter and two of flour. On low heat, add in a cup of milk and a half cup of grated Parmesan. As it thickens, add a half cup of Coca-Cola. Pour the sauce over a half pound each of cooked shrimp, crab, lobster, and sole. Top with bread crumbs and bake for 20 minutes.

Twinkie Sushi

Cut Twinkies into inch-long pieces and wrap them in strips of green Fruit Roll-Ups. The result looks like sushi. Serve with dried mango strips (which look like pickled ginger).

Pringles Candy

Mix three cups of crushed Pringles potato chips into a melted package of almond bark. Stir in a cup of Spanish peanuts. Pour onto wax paper; cool, dry, and break into pieces.

Peppers with Creamy Sauce

Remove the seeds from six green (or red) bell peppers that have been cut in half. Melt a package of marshmallows. Fill the peppers with the creamy marshmallow sauce and bake until brown.

Kool-Aid Pickles

Soak some dill pickles in a pitcher filled with equal parts vinegar and cherry or tropical punch–flavored Kool-Aid. The result is a pickle that’s sweet, sour…and bright red.

Maple Bacon Donut

If you like bacon, waffles, donuts, and maple syrup, you’ll love this simple treat: Take a maple bar (a donut with maple frosting, also called a maple long john) and place two strips of crispy bacon on top…and hope you have good health insurance.